Do you REALLY know Bill Murray?

Me neither.

Via: Online School

The Day It Got Weird

I finally got to take my little girl to her first concert. July 28, 2010, Amarillo, Texas, in the Globe News Center. Weird Al Yankovic brought his show to town again.

My wife and I had seen Weird Al a little over 10 years ago during the "Running with Scissors" Tour (March 2000). She was then pregnant with Madison. We took a pillow to muffle the sound from the unborn ears. Flash forward to yesterday, A.D., and the kid got to see Al and Company rock the Yellow City. We were 3rd row, center. Al came into the audience and grooved down the slightly-wider row behind us during "Wanna B Ur Lovr," practically leaning on her and Carmen's heads.

The show was amazing, and Al stayed after to sign some stuff and let us take pictures. It was an amazing time, his band is incredible, playing music from every genre, and he just could not have been nicer. He seemed genuinely taken aback when Carmen told him that the girl he just signed for was in utero during his last visit to Amarillo.

"You have really pretty handwriting."

I got hit on at a Taco Bell by a young man when I was with my new wife in 1998.

The counter guy was weirdly nervous as he took our order, brought our tray, and asked if we needed any Fire Sauce or Fiesta Sauce or whatever they were calling it that month.

"You have really pretty handwriting."

The kid took my check, and, blushing while looking at my... man area.... said, "You have really pretty handwriting." My wife has never let me forget, because, as anyone knows, I have horrible handwriting. It must be code or something...

http://store.mcsweeneys.net/index.cfm/fuseaction/catalog.detail/object_id/86dd6b4a-88b3-4615-8fc5-fcfcb22bfd1e/JaguarTshirt.cfm

The caption reads: "Man, you've got good-looking handwriting."

Mellon-Colic

My favorite things to blog about: procrastination. And that other one....

Pick a direction

Sadly, I didn't keep up with this. Is it humor? Is it social commentary? Is it political venting? Well, on the plus side, I am writing everyday, mostly comedy, and I always have a notebook near. Also great, Facebook has helped me focus more on comedy and write something every day there as well. I may yet make something of this site. We shall see. My friend, Tim, and I are pushing one another to write every day. Occasionally so is my great friend Sean. I hope all my note taking will lead to works that make people laugh, even if it is at me and my mistakes!

I'll give you something to cry about...

Saw this posted by another friend and thought you should see it.

www.dayswithmyfather.com

I was finally able to make myself look at this. What a treasure of sadness.

The body betrays,
But the Soul endures.

It should be labeled Not Safe For Work. Crying at my desk scares the co-workers.

I miss my mom. No matter how crazy she was or how crazy she made me sometimes, there was always laughter. She has been gone almost 10 years.

No waterboarding for me, please.

I just had the most vivid and disturbing dream. I was being waterboarded. I could not breathe. My face was wrapped in tee-shirt material. My mouth was open, but I could not get a breath. I was leaned upside down and water was being poured on my face. I couldn't breathe in through my nose. I could not stop it. I had thought I could make it through because I thought I knew the fear of drowning from my bout with pulmonary embolisms. I was wrong. I cannot shake the feeling that at that moment, on some parallel earth, another me was being tortured. Crazy? Sure. My chest hurts, my heart is still pounding now 30 minutes later, I cannot breathe deeply. I hope that God helps anyone this is or was being done to, on whatever world.